As a society we have become accustomed to certain ways of life. We walk down the halls with an innocent, unassuming nature to what has been deemed as “normal.” Well, I’m here to tell you: WAKE UP BERKELEY HIGH SCHOOL. Not everything is as it seems, more specifically, those passersby, fellow peers who you see wearing “glasses.”
Our story of deceit begins with a simple man known as Salvino D’Armate. History claims [the government wants you to think] that he was a real person who lived in the years surrounding 1284, the late 13th century. They have written a tale alleging he invented the first pair of spectacles using crystal-like rocks.
Now, I know as well as the next guy that homosapiens have created fire and harnessed electricity, these are “facts” I have accepted, but the modern-day spectacle just isn’t sitting right with me. Call me crazy, call me a fanatic, or call me what I really am: a purveyor of knowledge and a seeker of the truth.
As a seeker of the truth, I take upon my shoulders the burden of exposing the government, and today I begin with “glasses.” First, let me discount the propaganda surrounding Salvino D'Armate that has been shoved down our throats, choking what little truth remains. Yes, D’Armate likely existed, and by this I mean that we cannot prove he didn’t exist. However, we also cannot prove that he actually invented glasses. There are no remaining relics of the first pair, or any pair following up until 1984. To prove the existence of glasses in 1284 is to prove the existence of God: impossible. Why, then, do we so readily believe the history that has been softly whispered into our ears since birth, coaxing us into belief?
The government is full of clever bastards. Forty years ago, in the year 1984, the government was having its weekly tea time when Ex-President Ronald Reagan had an idea. He sipped his decaf chamomile, and a thought arose in his meek, wrinkly head, “I want to watch my citizens.” To him, it was an idea so breath-takingly genius that he choked on his chamomile! As he coughed and sputtered out the words for his plan, no one in the room had the heart to tell him it had been done before. To protect his fragile ego, they devised a plan; they couldn’t copyright what the rest of the world was already doing to its citizens, but they could figure out a new way to do the exact same thing.
After two more cups of tea and rather dry biscuits, the team began to brainstorm. It was a man named Vinsola Teamard, hastily trying to rush the meeting as he had a weekend in Aspen quickly approaching, who came up with the idea. Inspired by his ski goggles, he proposed they create some form of hightech camera that can be worn on the face. Vinsola Teamard, rearrange the letters and what do you get? Salvino D’armate, a not-so-clever tribute to Teamard, the real creator of glasses.
As soon as they had a working prototype, the government began mass production of their spectacles, but they needed a more modern name. Something that could fly under the radar as their brainwashing of the US population began. At the same time as this problem arose, Reagan was refinishing the windows on his family home in Illinois. Surrounded by glass all day, he realized it bore an astounding resemblance to the clear, covert cameras in the government’s new spy-spectacles. This was one of three cohesive thoughts Reagan had during presidency, and it quickly became the name of the government’s biggest fabrication in history.
Soon, the plan was in motion. The government filled the internet with propaganda surrounding the history of glasses. They planted spies into every aspect of life whose primary job was to gaslite citizens into believing glasses had always existed. There is no “optometrist's office,” no, this is merely a meeting place for the government to tap citizens they feel have a spy-potential. Every picture of glasses before the year 1984 has been edited. Every person born before 1984 who wears glasses had all of their identification pictures altered to make their false truth believable.
Berkeley High School students, citizens of our world, I urge you to open your eyes. The people who you thought might have been your friends could be recording your every move. Sending it to a big, scary database and doing god knows what with it. “Glasses” are a fucking sham! Sorry, I shouldn’t use such doltish language, but I can’t sit idly by and watch as my fellow humans are exploited and scrutinized by hateful eyes [the government]. Why should you believe me? I’m just an anonymous voice, words on a page. To that I say, if we can’t trust the people who make our laws and run our lives, who can we trust? It’s up to you, trust the flawed systems that exist, or trust the only person who has bothered to wake you the hell up and tell you the goddamn truth.